The Importance of Getting Together
By Mike Apodaca, High Desert Branch
There are many people I admire but few I respect more than Debbie Walker. Debbie has figured out something most people have not—she needs her people.
For years, Debbie met daily with friends at a local donut shop. These visits gave her a circle of companions, people she knew by name and cared about. People who cared for her. When that group ended, Debbie searched for a new community. She found it in our writing club. Notice the intentionality here—Debbie knows she needs what we all need and is doing something about it. Debbie meets with us at Corky’s on Thursday mornings at 9:00. She attends Salons and the Sounding Board. Her writing has improved exponentially but so have her relationships. Debbie is often there for others, filling needs of those who have a pet that requires feeding while they are gone or providing a ride to the doctor. She also secures weekly speakers for the S.W.I.M. program in Hesperia (no small task).
We all need community. I just read an article on this in Time magazine by Adam Chandler. He explains that the percentage of people who have no friends has skyrocketed. People are now seventeen times more likely to not have any friends than they were in 1990. This is due to many societal factors and has an effect on our happiness and mental health. We’re all being pushed into isolation by unseen forces—in order to fight them, we need to make different choices.
It warms my heart when I come into Corky’s and see two tables filled with our wonderful members. I always wonder who I’ll end up in conversation with and what stories they’ll share with me. I’ve found that we’re surrounded by fascinating people with a wide range of experiences. We’re all storytellers. At Corky’s we find friends willing to listen and share.
The same is true when we go out to lunch after our Saturday meetings. From time immemorial, people have grown close around tables with food. When we go out to lunch, we grow closer. We also learn from each other. Our writers are testing new technologies (Richard Spencer), making inroads into publishing (John Garner), and are
experts in editing and formatting our work (Jenny Margotta).
Lastly, there’s the benefit of being known—to have people who care about what you care about. When you move from being a stranger to being a friend, people will ask you about a sick family member, or an ailment you’re struggling with, a story you’re writing, or an event you recently attended. It is very different when you are with people who know you and who really care.
Let’s fight the tide. Stand against isolation and take advantage of the Wednesday morning Zoom check-in, the Corky’s meetings, the Saturday meetings and lunch
afterwards, the salons, and the many critique groups in our club. Connect wherever you can. Come to listen and to share.
“The Importance of Getting Together”
originally appeared in the March 2025 Inkslinger,
newsletter of the High Desert Branch.