Thankful for Writing Friends and Friendships
By Joan Raymond, Writers of Kern (Bakersfield Branch)
I’ve started this column three different times and deleted my progress each time. The right words weren’t coming. This has been a rough week. Beginning with the tragic shooting in Las Vegas to the death of Tom Petty. Then as I tried to avoid Facebook, I saw my long-time friend Vicki post that her mother had passed away. Vicki and I have been friends for 50 years, her mom was like my second mom. I was numb, and sad, and I couldn’t find the words to express my grief. She posted the funeral would be Friday, October 6, at a Catholic church in Fresno. And then it hit me. Friday, the 6th was also the 39th anniversary of my own mother’s passing. I finally realized why everything hit me so hard.
Vicki and I met in 4th grade. Both of us started in April, a few months before the end of that school year because our fathers had transferred to Fresno from other cities. We became close friends, and until we graduated from 8th grade, Vicki and I spent almost every Friday night at one of our houses. We played Scrabble (she always won), made cookies from those big refrigerated cookie dough packages, played “Heart and Soul” on the piano, and we wrote. Over those four years we wrote a radio play “Dead Cooks Tell No Tales.” We wrote parodies of the 11:00 news shows. And we wrote a lot of stories. After we wrote them, we read and recorded them on cassette tapes – many of which I still have! She also snuck a peek at my diary and told the entire 8th grade class about my crush on one of our classmates. But I forgave her, and because of our friendship and shared love of writing, I continued on the writing path.
As much as I tried to write a different president’s message, this is the one that wanted to be written. It would seem that over the years I’d know enough to let the words flow instead of forcing something I thought would be better. I’ve always been a ‘pantser’ – one who writes by the seat of their pants, not a ‘plotter’ one who plots it all out. I have to wait until the story is ready to come out instead of planning it. And although is a different kind of message this month, I wanted to share it to say, it’s okay when the words don’t come. Because eventually they will, but maybe not as we envisioned them.
Sometimes, even though we’re writers, we need to be patient. And wait. And take the time to remember back to those first stories or diary entries and who and what inspired us to start down our writing paths.
If it’s possible, I encourage you to take the time to thank someone who has inspired and encouraged you on your writing journeys. The mentors. The teachers. The friends or family members. The ones who made a difference in where you are today. Maybe they never knew. Maybe they did. Either way, it’s always good to remind people how important they are (or were) in your writing journey. And if they’re not with us any longer, write a note of gratitude. We’re writers. That’s what we do.
This touching tribute originally
appeared in Joan Raymond’s President’s Message,
October 2017 edition of the Writers of Kern newsletter,
The Write Way.